A couple of my readers have asked that I share my thoughts and reflections on each Dom. Being the sweet sub that I am, I am a natural people-pleaser. So here goes.
I connect everything, I mean everything… to music. I am funny that way. When I meet someone, I usually have a theme for them in my head. When I see them, I hear it, and occasionally I will actually hear the song in the car, which makes me think of that person. This is not indigenous to the men in my life. It’s everyone. Everyone I know has a song in my head. (I wonder if Dr. Pierce is reading this…maybe he could diagnose it.) I rarely share with the person what their song is. They often don’t get it and begin to overanalyze, so it’s just easier to keep that to myself.
Now that I’ve cleared that up
On to the ceremony….In my reflections I have assigned each suitor a song
These are in no particular order, so don’t read in to it.
It’s always fun to start with the Sadist. No we have not played together yet, but this man deserves an award for pushing mental limits. Our chats are sporadic and usually intense. We discuss everything from our vanilla selves to the most depraved acts known to modern civilization. He honestly scares me to death and readily feeds my addiction to fear and risky behavior (Dr. Pierce…please take note of this too). When I think of him, I think of an all-encompassing persona. A person who takes your breath away, literally. So my song for Mr. Bond, aka Cruel Bastard, aka The Sadist is:
“And I will be the one, to hold you down
Kiss you so hard
I’ll take your breath away
And after I wipe away your tears
Just close your eyes, dear”
Yes, I know….most of the song was written by Sarah McLachlan’s stalker, but it speaks to the kind of theme I feel when we explore different scenarios.
Don Knots, aka the hog-tier
Don was a frustrated Boy Scout wound tighter than the twine he used. Honestly, this was an enlightening experience for me because I realized that I was not into what I refer to as, “heavy bondage”. His fix was the restraint, the knots (OMG the knots…thank God there were scissors in case of emergency) and my helplessness. Outside of the anticipation and the paddling, it really did nothing for me. But it did give me the thrill of the experience. The thrill from the loss of control.
It was a bad, bad thing….
So my song for Mr. Knots, aka the Boy Scout is:
The good doctor was socially awkward and sexually confusing. Who would have thought that a mild-mannered Sheldon-esque man would have such a trick as his offering. There are so many songs that play in my head. But because of the elevator scene, which happened in the first minutes of our meeting…this song imprinted on my mind as the whole thing was unfolding…you guessed it….
My song for Dr. Pierce:
I debated on another song during the painful date, as we were out listening to some live bands. I was thankful for the atmosphere since it was SILENT most of the time. The song I tossed around covered by one of the local bands, was Kings of Leon, “Sex on Fire.” But I just can’t get the elevator scene out of my head….
The obvious song is “Good Vibrations” but I think the Mark Wahlberg stand-in deserves better than that. With his swagger and potty mouth, he was always the consummate Southern gentleman. I think a funky, dirty, ballsy song fits him. So I am going with the White Stripes. There’s something raunchy in their sound and it just fits.
My song for Mark:
And on a side note, Mr. Mark and I are working on some business stuff together. Keeping it G rated and making it rain in the world of business. To quote him, “Girl, you are the shit. You got that purty head on straight. That’s for sure.” Now who doesn’t love a man who can express himself?
With his domineering way and genuine care and concern, Father D is the one to watch. His domination is so sublime, that you honestly don’t realize you’re being controlled. This appeals to the fear addict in me. I also see a glimmer of darkness in him, after all he has been in the lifestyle for quite a long time. I have been threatened with being placed over his knee and spanked, unforgivingly. I feel he will teach me the ways of the D/s dynamic, while appealing to my needs in the vanilla world.
Hidden in the open, just as he wants it.
My song for Father D:
“If you are the desert, I’ll be the sea
If you ever hunger, hunger for me
Whatever you ask for, that’s what I’ll be”
So now we are left with the dark horse….
Sir is an enigma. So brooding and mysterious, but so kind and patient. He’s the voice in my head of moral conscience. He is ever-faithful in his support of my journey to spiritual wholeness. But Sir, as much as he does not like to admit it, is a natural Dom. He’s a very adept Dom. And although our interactions are all via text and always faith-based, he exerts a level of domination that is surprising. What makes his message to me so credible is that he’s on a similar journey. He is my spiritual Dom.
My song for Sir
“Take me to Church,
I’ll worship like a dog
At the shrine of your lies
I tell you my sins
So you can sharpen your knives
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life”
Sir will probably hate the song and find it blasphemous. Sorry, it’s what’s in my head. And that’s the way it is.
So to recap so far:
Most Terrifying Dom: Mr. Bond
Most Restrained Dom: Knots, Don Knots
Most Awkward: Dr. Pierce
Most Swagger: Marky Mark
Most Unpredictable Dom: Father D
Most Reluctant Dom: Sir