Magical Beasts

It is not my intent to sound dramatic, but I always seem to find myself in a hostage situation. Not literally. But different things consume my life. They hold me there with their demands. Their ransom disguised as responsibility. I can see freedom, but I can’t seem to get there. And just when I resign myself to Stockholm Syndrome, I am rescued.


Despite the titles I wear and roles I assume, I cannot deny who I am.

Always, I am his.

He is the only one who can rescue me from my captors.

He tears down the walls and pulls the doors off of the hinges. He scoops me up with his strong arms and takes me away from my holding cell.

He rescues me. He releases me. He reveals me.

He reminds me of who he is when he tilts my face to his. When his eyes meet mine. When his fingers touch my skin, the invisible rope that has me bound in knots slides effortlessly to the floor.

When his lips touch mine I am transported to a beautiful place. A sanctuary where I am always safe.

He slowly leads me back to me. Because at my core, I am a flawed and needy magical beast. I crave nothing more than my Master’s touch.

I am transformed by our depth of intimacy. I am changed by our absolute love and devotion to each other.

It is beyond a kinky scene. It goes beyond lovemaking. It is a metamorphosis, really.

And maybe I am rambling on about this man of mine. Maybe I am just pensive from the amazing time we spent together. I cannot do it justice with words. It transcends language, as it was on a different plane.

But I do feel different today. Closer to who I am. Closer to him.

Unicorn 420

(More to come)




The Deep End

Today is Friday.  Finally an end to a painfully  long week.

Tomorrow is Saturday.

My journey continues. 

As I prepare for my encounter with James Bond (aka the sadistic grinner) I see a vivid mental image of what I am about to experience.

Up to this point, here’s my journey so far.

I am sticking my toe in the pool.  Feeling the initial shock from the cool water.

Then dangling my legs in the pool.  Only exposing part of me to the water.

Halfway in, but halfway out.  Gradually easing into the pool.

Allowing myself the time to adjust to the harsh change in temperature.

As I become comfortable…plunging under the water, completing submerged.

Emerging refreshed and aware.  Confident.

Tomorrow’s image is a bit different.

I picture myself climbing a hill. It’s a long trek.

Winding.  Rocky.  Steep in places.

I continue to climb.  Heading towards my destination.  Determined.

Reaching the pinnacle, I survey my progress.

Looking down at the lake, I see the crystal blue water.

Without hesitation, I walk to the edge of this cliff I’ve conquered.

With arms outstretched, I let go.

I let go and dive into the uncertain waters below….

Plunging into the depths of my desires and fears.  Slowly taking it all in.

Finally…coming to the surface to breathe.

Feeling alive.


let go